Did Trump Plan to Cheat on A Pre-Debate Drug Test?

Gotta admit Trump is something of an evil genius: his ploy to call for a mutual workplace employment drug test before Thursday's Presidential Debacle (aka Debate) may well have lead to Biden trying to perform without Jacking Up, with disastrous results for the Democrats, and the country. 

In his usual Teflonic and ironic fashion, The Donald managed to skirt the issue of the long list of performance-and-other drugs given out like candy at his White House, and the persistent accusations that he's the one on drugs. That he offered to take such a test himself means nothing, considering that he has no compunction about cheating on elections, his wives, and almost everything else. The fact that his plan was backed by former White House doctor Ronny (as in Reagan) Jackson (whose name Trump got wrong while bragging about passing the cognitive tests he administered), makes me wonder if his dastardly plan was to have Dr. Johnson-Jackson administer the tests, duly bribed to provide a negative result for Trump. 

Leading up to the debate, MSNBC's Rachel Maddow laughed heartily at Chis Hayes's pronouncement that, "If performance drugs make you a better debater and president, I'm all for them." My twitter feed ruminated a bit on that, pointing out that it's "too bad the performance enhancers Trump is on make him even more delusional, narcissistic and evil." 

Then Jon Stewart, who appeared live post-debate, nailed the thought as only he can (because, Great Heads Think Alike):

“Let me just say after watching tonight’s debate, both of these men should be using performance-enhancing drugs, as much of it as they can get, as many times a day as their bodies will allow. If performance-enhancing drugs will improve their lucidity, their ability to solve problems, and in one of the candidate’s cases, improve their truthfulness, morality and malignant narcissism, then suppository away.” — JON STEWART

"He should take a lie detector test," mused anti-workplace-drug-testing crusader Dale Gieringer. Except that Trump is so delusional, he'd probably pass it. Or find a way to cheat it. Workplace piss tests, which were once as used by something like 75% of Fortune 500 companies in a kind of chemical McCarthyism, are commonly cheated using methods like fake pee, and even fake penises (one wonders: would Trump's fake one look like a mushroom?). 

It's now come out that John F. Kennedy and many others at the time availed themselves of amphetamines dispensed (in the ass, as Trump accused of Biden) by their own "Dr. Feelgood," Max Jacobson. Indeed, the Nazi regime was munching the methamphetamines that the Panzer troops were given, and Americans followed suit. 

It's high time for candidates, and their constituents, use more enlightening drugs already. Maybe then we'd stop the elder abuse of not letting senior statesmen like Biden and Mitch McConnell resign in order that their parties may hold onto their power.