High Lily, High Lily

My favorite line from Lily Tomlin's masterful album "Modern Scream" comes from this mock question:

Interviewer: "Lily, is it true you have a drug problem?"
Lily: "Yes, it's so hard to get good grass these days."

As one of the two "tokin' women" honoring George Carlin when he posthumously won the Mark Twain Prize,  she opened with, "I flatter myself to think that George and I somehow drank from the same comedy fountain. Or should I say 'inhaled'? Or perhaps I shouldn't."

Lily inhaled on screen with Dolly Parton and Jane Fonda in the  1980 movie "9 to 5," at a pot party that bonded the characters in a deliciously wicked plot to improve their workplace conditions. (It's true: pot leads to communism.) Tomlin's "Tasteful Lady" is a great send-up of the kind of "Mothers Against Everything" that would put the clampdown on cannabis.

Yet I had never heard Tomlin fully "out" herself as a pot smoker until the October issue of Culture Magazine, whose cover is graced with Lily rocking a black bowler hat.

Asked if she's an advocate for marijuana legalization, Tomlin replied, "Yes, yes. Of course."

She said she doesn't have a doctor's recommendation, and asked, "Can you get me one?...I have to rely on the kindness of strangers. I don't use everyday. I'm not that fresh and hip." To the question, does she have any favorite of cannabis strains, Tomlin replied, "I wish I was that sophisticated."

At 72, Tomlin is back on TV as the mother of Reba McEntire in the upcoming ABC sitcom Malibu. She'll appear onstage on January 19, 2013 at the Sunset Cultural Center in Carmel, CA.

In May, Tomlin and longtime writing/life partner Jane Wagner were honored by Sen. Barbara Boxer. Maybe the two should have a toke, and a talk. UPDATE: Maybe they did. 

UPDATE 9/14: Tomlin will receive a 2014 Kennedy Center Honor. The gala will be broadcast on December 30. (Many other Very Important Potheads have received the Honor.) She and Jane Fonda will co-star in the new Netflix series Grace and Frankie.

Tales of Two Tokin' Women: Fiona Apple and Lady Gaga

UPDATE 10/15: The Texas sheriff that arrested Apple 

is now refusing to arrest marijuana offenders. 

Fiona Apple was caught on Wednesday with small amounts of marijuana and hashish in Sierra Blanca, Texas, making her the first woman to be nabbed in the same border town where Willie Nelson, Snoop Dogg and Armie Hammer were also arrested by the US Border Patrol. (Hammer was reportedly carrying baked goods from his wife's bakedery.)

 Apple was arrested and jailed, and spoke about her experience at her Houston concert. It's about time someone spoke up about what a violating experience being jailed is. Apple's arrest is potentially much more serious than the others who got their wrists slapped, since hash possession reportedly can bring a 3-10 year sentence in Texas, even though it's just concentrated cannabis.

There is possibly no other artist who digs as deep as Apple does, with undeniable talent and honesty. She is back on the musical scene after a 7-year hiatis, with her presciently titled new album The Idler Wheel Is Wiser than the Driver of the Screw, And Whipping Cords Will Serve You More Than Ropes Will Ever Do. We wish all the best to the extraordinary machine that she is. She'll be in New Orleans on Monday night, and touring the East Coast thereafter.

Apple's arrest blunted my enthusiasm about the news that Lady Gaga lit up a joint onstage at her concert in Amsterdam, declaring weed "wondrous." She was quoted as telling The Sun newspaper: "I want you to know it has totally changed my life and I’ve really cut down on drinking."

One commenter wrote: "Good now she won't end up like Amy." (Gaga has famously gained 25 pounds, possibly due to the munchees and healthier habits.) Another wrote: "Good on you Lady Gaga. Makes me want to reach for one. Unfortunately it is totally acceptable for celeb's to indulge in whatever their desire, but not for regular folks like us. LoL." They're right, and I'm not laughing about it.

Tickets for Gaga's Born this Way Ball on Feb. 22 at Madison Square Garden go on sale on Sept. 28. Since she has 29 million Twitter followers, we think they're likely to sell out.

Where Are the Top Female Marijuana Users?

Maya Angelou

The Marijuana Policy Project has released a list of Top 50 Most Influential Marijuana Users, chosen by vote from 200 candidates (and augmented by MPP's 13 "automatic qualifiers").

Only five women make the list. Sarah Palin comes in at number 14, and poet Maya Angelou is number 21. Angelina Jolie is 24th on the list, even though she said she doesn't like pot's effects. Jennifer Aniston shows up at number 38 and Whoopi Goldberg at 44. Lady Gaga missed the cut, coming in at #52.

The maleness of the list could be a reflection of MPP's membership, or of their own selection of the 200 nominees. High Times's readership is almost exclusively young males, and groups like NORML have traditionally been male-heavy (although the NORML Women's Alliance is working to change that).

NORML board member Greta Gaines made some waves recently when she published an Alternet.org article titled "Why Are No Women Celebrity Stoners Willing to Come Out of the Greenhouse." Gaines got a few things wrong, dissing Melissa Etheridge as a mere medical marijuana advocate, and failing to recognize that women like Aniston, Sarah Silverman, Cameron Diaz, Kirsten Dunst and others have spoken publicly about their marijuana use. But if the MPP list is a reflection of public perception, her point is one that needs to be made.

Most are aware that women had a role in bringing about alcohol prohibition, but many don't know that they also helped bring it down. Pauline Morton Sabin was one important player who was highlighted in Ken Burns's PBS series "Prohibition." A panel at the national NORML conference on Saturday, October 6 will explore women's role in ending America's prohibitions. An NWA Luncheon will follow. Read more and register.

See a round-up of prominent female cannabis connoisseurs, now and then.

Ayn Rand on Drugs

Ayn Rand

After saying that Ayn Rand was required reading for all his interns and his biggest influence for getting into politics, House Speaker Paul Ryan has now said he enjoyed Rand's novels but rejects her atheistic philosophy.

That's too bad, because Rand opposed drug prohibition, although she called taking drugs "suicide" and said marijuana "destroys the mind." At least, so says a web search.

According to the book Ayn Rand Answers by Robert Mayhew (Penguin, 2005) as quoted by OnTheIssues.org, Rand said,

"I do not approve of any government controls over consumption, so all restrictions on drugs should be removed (except, of course, on the sale to minors). The government has no right to tell an adult what to do with his own health and life. That places a much greater moral responsibility on the individual; but adults should be free to kill themselves in any way they want.

"I would fight for your legal right to use marijuana; I would fight you to the death that you morally should not do it, because it destroys the mind. What the government should do is protect citizens from the criminal consequences of those who take drugs. But drugs would be much cheaper if it weren't for government."

Rand can be heard on tape saying, "I think drugs should be sold openly because it is an individual's right to commit suicide if he wants to...If drugs were sold legally, that would put that whole underworld and all the drug addicts as pushers out of business."

The Daily Kos quotes Wikipedia quoting Jennifer Burns's book Goddess of the Market: Ayn Rand and the American Right (Oxford University Press, 2009) with this tasty nugget: "While completing her second novel (The Fountainhead), Rand began taking the prescription amphetamine Benzedrine to fight fatigue. ... Her continued use of it for several decades also may have contributed to volatile mood swings observed by her associates in later years."

The Rand Watch blog explored the theme for a 2010 story, "Was Ayn Rand a Drug Addict?, which says,

"In addition to her indisputable addiction to nicotine (she was a chain smoker) there’s no question that Ayn Rand was a habitual consumer of amphetamines starting in 1942, when she was prescribed Benzedrine for weight loss (a common medical practice in that era) and discovered that it gave her the energy to put in the long hours needed to finish the first of her two major novels, The Fountainhead. Rand liked the boost that 'speed' gave her, and from that time until at least 1972 – a period of 30 years – she continued to use amphetamines, moving on to Dexedrine and Dexamyl."

Judging from the way they spun their lies in convention speech after speech, Republicans will have no trouble spinning away Ryan's admiration for that godless speed freak Ayn Rand with her wild ideas on everything but the economic policies that favor his tax bracket.

Me and Morello (2019)

Rand also said, "I am certainly in favor of abortion...I'd like to express my indignation at the idea of confusing a living human being with an embryo...The idea of some bitches---and I don't apologize for that--trying to prescribe to all other women what they should do with their lives is disgusting. And they call it a right to life!" I'm guessing the GOP won't be adopting that moral stance either.

Burns appeared on The Colbert Report on August 29 and called Rand's writings "the gateway drug" for the New Right. Burns said the last thing Rand wrote was a denunciation of Ronald Reagan. Too bad Ayn's not around to give her opinion on Ryan. Tom Morello of Rage Against the Machine, a band who Ryan says he admires, has written an eloquent response in Rolling Stone. Wait until everyone from AC/DC to Led Zepplin have their say.

Phyllis Diller: She Inspired Comics and Cannabis

The world is mourning Phyllis Diller, who broke the gender barrier in stand-up comedy as a 37-year-old housewife and inspired new generations of female comics everywhere.

It's doubtful that Diller smoked pot. Born in 1917, she was from what George Will called "the Falstaff generation." She joked that for her health she drank a lot of water "and a lot of gin." In her New York Times obituary she is quoted about doing stand-up, "I don't want to sound like a doper, but it's a high."

Googling her name plus "marijuana" gives a surprising result: a strain of cannabis named "Phyllis Diller" is for sale at the Medical Marijuana Relief Clinic in Sherman Oaks. A sativa strain, I'm guessing it got its name because it resembles the shaggy hairstyle famously sported by Diller.  

The torch has been passed to a new generation. Diller was remembered by her friend and protegée Joan Rivers on CBS This Morning. Rivers smoked marijuana on her reality show earlier this year and said back in the day she smoked it with Betty White, George Carlin, Woody Allen and Bill Cosby.

Another "domestic goddess" comedienne who admired Diller is Roseanne Barr. Barr was roasted on Comedy Central on Saturday, and joked that Obama could pry her medical marijuana out of her cold, dead hands. She had the last laugh as she ended her bit by singing, very well, lines from the National Anthem. Barr says in her book Roseannarchy that giving up the "herb of the goddess" in favor of pharmaceutical drugs contributed to her famously blowing the song. She is the Peace and Freedom party nominee for President in 2012, on a ticket with VP nominee Cindy Sheehan.

Among those "Tweeting" their admiration for Diller yesterday were VIPs Barbra Streisand, Whoopi Goldberg. and Bill Maher.

Another "High" Profile Parental Rights Case

Ross and his Gold.

Canadian snowboarder Ross Rebagliati is the latest "high" profile divorce case to see accusations of parental marijuana smoking. It's something that's happening to mothers and fathers everywhere, even possibly Paul McCartney.

This case is something special, however. Rebagliati won the first-ever Olympic gold medal in snowboarding, in 1998, and nearly lost his medal after testing positive for marijuana just afterwards. He kept his prize after claiming he'd been a victim of secondhand smoke at a send-off party in Whistler.

Now Rebagliati's ex-wife is claiming she has found marijuana residue on their son's hair, alleging he was also exposed to second-hand smoke during visits to his father. Whether or not this test is valid, or if it would even harm the boy if it's true, is unknown. They've just found out that baby shampoo can give a positive test for marijuana, for one thing.

Ross was charming and well spoken on Jay Leno's show after the Games. He told Jay his reaction to hearing he tested positive was, "Holy smokes!" He admitted to smoking until April of 1997, but said he quit to follow the Olympic rules. Leno joked, "So unlike Bill Clinton, who said he smoked but didn't inhale, you inhaled but didn't smoke."

Ross laughed about the jokes he was made the butt of (Jay called him Ross Nickel Bag-Liati), but you've got to wonder what it's been like for him, after all he's accomplished, to have the stigma of being a "pothead" following him around. According to Wikipedia, he won a libel suit against producers of a TV series that defamed him. He couldn't even attend Mitt Romney's Salt Lake City Olympic Games due to a law denying entry into the so-called "land of the free" to any known drug user. (Amy Winehouse was denied entry for a US music festival for the same reason.)

Rebagliati now admits to smoking pot for aching joints, but not daily. It's not inconceivable that his joints would now ache. Many current and former athletes have presented themselves to California doctors for pain relief, and one author even thinks it could save the NFL.

As more parents speak out and stand up for their rights, the tide is turning towards reason, rather than breaking up families over a little marijuana use. The New York Times recently ran an article titled Pot for Parenting written by a San Francisco art gallery owner who finds himself a better father after smoking his medical marijuana. And a California court recently ruled that a father's medical marijuana use was not sufficient reason to infringe on his parental rights. 

Let's all stand up for parents everywhere who use marijuana responsibly.

Lisa Marie Pothead?

Lisa Marie Presley, the only child of Elvis, is back in the US with a new CD, Storm and Grace, said to be her best.  When asked by a journalist on her publicity tour, “Is there something you haven’t done that you’d like to do?" Presley replied, “One day, I would like to become a hippie and go off the grid and never be seen or heard from again. Just become a big pothead, you know?”

The 44-year-old mother of four has been living in England, but came back to LA when she heard that T-Bone Burnett wanted to produce her. She has reportedly left the church of Scientology; perhaps she's found a new religion?